Please God, Please.

Since I only have a few minutes before I have to go to my next class, I'm going to make this short.

I seem to be having trouble lately praying and talking to God, so I'm going to do it on here!

Dear Jesus,

        Thank you for this opportunity to come to this seemingly different world and the doors you've opened with many differnt people and organizations.  I'm trying not to get my hopes up for my talk with the emergency manager tomorrow as there's a very good possibility that there are no EMT opportunities here, but I ask you to please open doors for me in the EMS world.  We both know it's something I enjoy and I would really like to do it here, but if it's not in your plan, I completely understand.

Though I never became completely awesome friends with this guy back home, thank you for giving me the words of encouragement that I could then give to him in his difficult times last night.  Talking to him reminded me that you are always with me and are always speaking the truth into my ear, even when I don't want to hear it or are avoiding you.  You stand by my side no matter what.  Whether I'm stuggling and come to you or when I'm having a great time and am ignoring you.

Thank you for everything you've done for me and continue to do for me.

In Jesus' name I pray,

Amen.

Prayer

The simple thing that I've been needing to do this whole time and I've been avoiding it. . . and I don't know why.  I AM a new christian and I AM sometimes forgetful how powerful prayer is.  It's amazing how at one in the morning I can have a great conversation about Jesus with some girl whom I've never met before while sitting on the swings, but I forget about my prayers just 10 minutes later.

I go to supper tonight with my entire floor and our RA and sit with some of the guys whom I've talked to before, yet barely a word is said between us.  I try to talk to them and it's like I'm some alien from a different planet trying to make conversation.  No that's not the reason I don't want to be here, but it helps with the process of deciding if I want to stay or go back to Iowa.

As I'm sitting there, I start to think about prayer.  I've been struggling through all of this and am FINALLY realizing that I need to pray constantly about this.  I need to talk to God and listen to what he is saying.  

Annnddd my mom calls to screw up my night.  Thanks.

Strength

I've been here for six days and I feel as though nothing has changed.  I went on a retreat for my scholars group and as we were riding the bus home, they had us write a letter to ourselves which we would open about nine months from now.  My letter is as follows:

Dear Austin,
        Right now you are getting done with the PCS (President's Community Scholars) retreat and you don't know how to feel.  You're a little apprehensive about being a part of this group because you feel odd regarding the administration side of volunteering and service.  You're not sure if you'll be at OU next year or even next semester.   You feel like you don't know where to fit in.  Right at this given moment, your home is in Iowa and that's where you want to be.  Everyone says their friends from high school never last, but those are the people you want to be with right now.  They are the people you want to keep forever.  You've met many great individuals thus far but nobody compares to those friends you have back home.

        Sincerely,
                Austin J. Witt


You know, I've never had any troubles making friends before.  Though I've always been uncomfortable in large groups, small groups are fine for me.  This is different though. . . this is not something I think I am ready for, meaning the large masses of people.  I'm definitely ready for college and everything that college has to offer.  I don't like being somewhere where I know absolutely nobody.  Maybe it's just an adjustment that I'm going to have to overcome, but I feel like it's not.  I keep saying my home is in Iowa and I keep finding that to be true.  Everyone always says you have to overstep your comfort zone and I completely agree with that.  Unfortunately this situation has pushed me off the cliff of my comfort zone.

Tonight I went to a social gathering at one of the main buildings on campus to hopefully find someone whom I could befriend and get to know.  I did make small talk with a few people but it's not like you can say, "Hey! You're by yourself.  I'm by myself.  Let's be friends and go places together so that college won't be awkward for either of us!"  Life just doesn't work like that.

I'm trying to listen to God and see what His will is for me.  I just want to know if I'm going back to Iowa or staying here for the next four years.  He obviously knows where I think my heart is leading me but I have to listen to His plan.  I already know that my desires are going to get in the way but I'll try my best to listen to Him.

As I'm wrapping up my thoughts. . . I'm just really struggling.  When people asked about my college plans and if I was worried, I would always say that it's nothing for me to go so far away.  I'm now realizing that I was wrong.  I hope that once classes start I can get my mind off things and focus on studying.  (Never thought I'd say that!)  I just really want some normalcy back in my life.

Change

I'm usually ok with change unless I find it to be unnecessary. Going to college in Oklahoma for a reason that isn't my true calling in life is looking unnecessary right now. Don't get me wrong. I really like the campus and the people have been great so far, but my home is in Iowa right now. Where I've already spent my life making connections and planting my roots. 

I seem to tell myself that once I have a college major in mind everything will be ok. After knowing that simple part of my life, I can go forward and everything will turn out alright. But it almost stresses me out more thinking about what I want to do for the rest of my life BEFORE I even experience anything. I think the next few weeks are going to be taking things a day at a time and rolling with what the world throws at me. 

Lovin' life!

Boy oh boy was last night a crazy night!!  Just sitting around at Bible study and all of our phones go off saying there's a Tornado Warning for our area.  We look outside and see a few lonely clouds to the north and west but that's about it... Until my pager went off.  Then the seriousness hit. 

I was first to the fire station and went straight to the radar to look at what was coming.  I saw a small line of storms headed our way with multiple tornado warnings along the entire line.  It first looked as if the storm that was rotating wasn't even going to come new us.  As the radar kept updating, it kept moving more and more towards New Sharon and Mahaska County.  Another storm looked to be growing to the south and west of the primary storm and I told one of the fire department captains that if that storm matures, it's going to rotate just like all of the other storms along the entire line.  The primary rotating storm kept coming closer and closer and we started spreading all of our fire trucks and ambulance apart so if one thing does get hit, we don't lose all of our equipment. 

As the minutes ticked by, I sent out message after message of multiple warnings as they came out.  Finally, the new storm sucked some of the energy from the primary storm and we got out of the danger area.  Like I had originally thought though, the new storm started to rotate and the city of Oskaloosa became part of the new Tornado Warning. 

Long night with two different great groups of people that I enjoy being with.

AJW out!

Oh boy.

Apply for the Absentee Enrollment for Oklahoma? Check.  Get my car back after having the CERT car all weekend? Check.  Help prepare the softball field for the game tonight? Check.  Pay for my EMT National Registry test? Check.  Enjoy the softball game? Check.  Not much else to say... life is pretty good.  Unless you ask me what I'm going to be doing with my life.  People keep asking me that question everyday and I'm starting to finally say I'm "probably" not going to be doing meteorology.  "Oh it'll be an emergency services side of meteorology."  Making progress!!

I'm Back!!!

I've been writing to a blog-type website for the past week or so and I find it a little easier to get things out so I'm trying this whole blog thing again.  And for those reading this, the OhLife.com, blog-type website asks me to email it everyday and I plan on using that timeline for my blogging so I'm sorry if I waste anyone's time by blogging everyday.

OH MY F%#KING S*&T!!!!  Today was a crazy day!!  I started the very early morning with a 2:50AM ambulance call.  It went well and I realized again that I really enjoy being an EMT.  Then.... all hell broke loose!  Severe Thunderstorm Warnings, a Tornado Warning, and I finally got to drive the CERT car 10-33; a.k.a. Code; a.k.a. with the emergency lights on!!  (Not that exciting for most people but it was something I've really wanted to do since we got that car!)  Then it was slowing traffic and blocking flooded roads and later sandbagging the city water pumps before we got flooded out by the river.  All of this I did with the New Sharon Fire Department.  Everything I enjoyed about today had to do more with responding to emergency's and emergency management, not meteorology.  Yes, meteorology had to do with all of the events that took place today but I really enjoyed the vehicles with the lights and sirens!  And helping the community.. that's good too!